The hills are not so alive . . .

So maybe we won't be going to Asia after all. Although my boss is supportive, and his boss is somewhat supportive, the head of HR was apparently very negative on the idea of accommodating me. My boss thinks we can find a way to make something work but there's probably no way I'll be able to go for three months and still get paid - even if I work every day while I'm there. He said maybe they can let me go for six weeks but that's only his idea and no one else has signed off. They're concerned about setting a "bad" precedent that will put them in the position of having to provide the same accommodation to others in similar situations (but really, this is pretty one-off, don't you think?). I understand their position - to a point - and I'm trying not to be upset about it.

Big D and I were thinking that maybe we'll say that we can only sign a contract for A-Girl that commits her until November 15th which is currently the end of the run in Hong Kong. We could each go for seven weeks and be done with it. Even that's looking like it might not work if my company insists that I limit my absence to six weeks or less.

We talked to A-Girl about it and she says that she won't be disappointed if she doesn't go. We believe her, too. She's really worried about missing her friends and she's upset that she won't have her birthday here. What happens if we do take her there and she gets so homesick she can't stay? She's had dance recitals and chorus recitals but she's never performed live in a professional venue. What if she freaks out? I don't want to underestimate her - I really do think she'd be fine but my boss (admitting that it's totally not his place to say anything) asked whether we thought jumping into the deep end was a good idea for a child who's never been in the water. He has a point. She's never done any theater - ever. As much as I loved doing theater, she might hate it. (I doubt it, but it could happen).

What should we do? I don't know. And my husband doesn't know. And we don't really want to say no to this but we're concerned about saying yes and time is ticking and the decision isn't getting any easier. Part of me totally wants to throw caution to the wind and go for it - when would we get an opportunity like this again? Part of me understands how selfish and unrealistic that is. We want to travel to China some day and we will. We can afford it, so it's not like this is the only way we'd be able to travel. A-Girl has been working fairly steadily all year. She'll get other jobs. And it's highly likely that she'll get other opportunities to do theater. Although this feels like the chance of a lifetime, it really isn't.

As much as I want to go, I'm realizing that it may not be possible. If it isn't possible, I'll be disappointed. But it isn't about me, is it?